Zen Sarcasm

No, I didn't write this but I love it!

Zen Sarcasm

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I May not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
2 The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt or a leaky tire.
3. It's always darkest before dawn, so if you're going to steal your
neighbor's' newspaper, that's the time to do it.
4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be       promoted.
5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car
payments.
8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That
way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
9. If at first you don't succeed...Skydiving is not for you.
10. Give a man a fish and       he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

And that's the truth!  Are you with me?